Workwear can be stuffy and boring, can’t it?
Especially if you have been doing the same job for a number of years, and are stuck in a workwear rut.
How can we inject some personality into our work outfits, without looking too “Wackadoodle”?
Or, (worse, in my opinion) too sexy?
Today I attempted to achieve the difficult balance between
- Take me seriously, I am a professional.
- I am still a woman and wanted to be treated as one.
- I am an individual, with my own style!
I decided to wear this grey pencil skirt again, with a dark grey opaques, and my black chunky Mary Janes.
A little bit ugly, a little bit geeky….so obviously, I love them!
I slipped on a thermal base layer, then this grey poloneck (for warmth) before adding a pretty, silk, chiffon top.
The top is subtly colourful, adding texture, shape and interest to an otherwise boring look.
My green belt pulled everything together….and I could not resist a chunky necklace!
My grey bucket bag finished the look off, perfectly.
Sexy or not? That is the question!
As I was getting ready to take these shots, my husband commented,
“That’s a bit sexy is it not?”
I was genuinely confused.
To me this is not sexy look at all!
I argued my case
Lets think about this for a moment shall we….
- I have NO bare flesh (at all) on display. Flesh=Sexy…doesn’t it??
- I am wearing geeky Mary Jane shoes. Not a stiletto heel or low vamp in sight!
- Opaque tights leave everything to the imagination. Certainly not a sexy fishnet stocking.
- My wedge heels are ugly, clumpy and generally old-ladyish.
- I am wearing the dreaded poloneck (turtleneck) top. As a rule, men don’t like polonecks on women (unless they are sleeveless) they confuse them!
- This outfit has a sombre colour palette. Grey…how un-sexy can you get? No racy reds or girly pinks in sight.
- I am wearing glasses. Glasses are not supposed to be sexy….are they?!
Case closed.
Or, so I thought.
“See, none of this is sexy at all!!” I argued
“I’ll be the judge of that” he said.
This got me thinking…
How do we really know how other people perceive our outfits?
I remembered a party I had gone to, years ago (in my 20’s).
It had been a last minute thing and I had no time to go home and get changed.
So, my usual party dress/clubwear stayed in my wardrobe and I went out in my jeans (hipster bootcut…it was the 90’s!), chunky boots, and a tight fitting Tee (again, 90’s!).
No makeup and my long wavy hair in a high pony.
I was a fun party BUT, I had a lot of (unwanted) attention from men that night.
Much more than I had ever experienced “dressed up”.
Looking back I think it was because I looked comfortable, friendly and approachable.
Does that mean I was more sexy that night?
I guess so!
Beauty (and sexiness) is in the eye of the beholder.
I have to concede that my husband is right!
He will be the judge of what he finds sexy.
Sexiness is in the eye of the beholder… much like beauty.
One person’s ‘Sexy’ is another’s ‘Cheap and Trashy’.
One woman’s ‘Conservative’ is her husband’s ‘Slightly Racey’.
All of the so-called ‘Rules’ go out of the window!
This made me laugh.
So what is the answer?
How can we navigate this (difficult) territory, successfully?
Luckily the solution is simple…
Dress to suit yourself.
To suit your mood on that particular day.
To suit how you feel about yourself.
To suit how you feel about the occasion.
Don’t try and second guess the thoughts (or reactions) of anyone else.
You will fail.
Don’t try to please anyone else.
You will fail that too.
Be true to yourself and you will always feel good.
If you feel good then you look good, and that is a rule that always applies!
Have you ever been confused as someone’s reaction to an outfit you were wearing?
What item of clothing makes you feel your best?
Please let me know in the comments, or tweet me @samantha4blair.
I love hearing from you!
Bag: Dune (similar)
Tights: Levante
Skirt:Forver21
Top: Unknown (A charity shop find)…this is a pretty plain one.
Poloneck:Topshop
Belt: Tkmaxx (this one is lovely)
Necklace: M&S (this one is nice)
Shoes: Clarks Originals (these are lovely)